It Will Never Make Sense. Never.

I was talking to a friend the other day and they were upset about how they felt they had been there for someone and had tried their best to help a person out and basically got the ol f you in return. Their dilemma was they just couldn't understand how someone would do that to them, that they've been struggling trying to make sense of it. I feel bad for them and gave them the only reply that has made sense to me from being in similar situations. 

It will never make sense. Never. I'm sorry for the bad news but here's why. You aren't that type of person. You would never do that to someone else and because of that you can't relate therefore you will never have a good enough answer to make things better in your mind. It's like looking at a calculus book and trying to figure out why you can't solve the problems when you know nothing about calculus.

 If you value friendships, relationships, whatever label you attatch, then you expect those with those labels to have the same love and loyalty that you do. It hurts when you find out otherwise. You'll try to figure out the whys and hows until you're angry, sad, defeated. Then you'll learn to let go. To let them go. That their actions are no reflection upon who you are as a person but of themselves. 

I keep an extremely small circle and I'm fine with that. Does it mean I spend a lot of time by myself? Absolutely but I am fine with that as well. John and Ape are hands down two of the dearest friends I've ever had the priviledge of calling friends. Amazing, amazing, amazing people. I'd rather have two friends like them forever than a ton of people i may or may not be able to count on. I'm a quality over quantity kind of guy i reckon. 

So you're going to run into people like my friend and it's going to hurt but just remember that just because you are a good and loyal person doesn't mean everyone else has those same values and morals. And please remind yourself that it's not a reflection of who you are as a person...some people just suck. 

So treasure those ones that have your back and you have theirs. They seem to be few and far between anymore. 

I'm not bipolar-I have bipolar

Ryan M Sullivan