I'll just let you in that I'm not a fan of proper paragraph structure so hopefully that doesn't mange my blog hard to read. With that being said...
As the title suggests, I use to feel that my diagnosis defined who I am as a person and my intelligence. If you'll bear with me I'm going to take you on a journey of my early days, my struggles and demons to where I'm at in life now. It'll be as many parts as needed and if you're still reading at this point, well, it's greatly appreciated.
I was born in Colby, KS. I don't remember it but I drove thru it once as a young adult and a very nice town but I'm glad i ended up growing up where I did. I grew up out in the country as a child and I'm so glad I did and those are some of my fondest memories. I'll tell stories of that later as there are plenty to tell. Eventually we had to move to town because of my dad's job.
Skip ahead to around the age of 12 and i would say this is when I started noticing that things weren't 'normal' anymore. I remember seeing a little girl who I now realize isn't really there but I would've bet my lunch money she was back then and I continued to see her into my adult years. Freaky right? You have no idea. She wore her hair in pigtails, had an old timey childrens dress in white with blue underneath and was as real as this phone I'm typing on now to me. That was a huge clue that I was in for a journey the rest of my life but man I sure didn't know that back then. Once I realized no one else saw her I kept that BS to myself. I'd seen movies and knew what they did to crazy people! Little did I know I was still destined to visit those places.
Clue #2 was I had these really neat voices that liked to talk to me but darn the luck if I found out I was the only one that heard those. Well dammit, looks like strike two. We might as well hit strike #3 while we're here and that was I got to see 'demons' in people's faces. Imagine being twelve and seeing that. If you've seen The Devil's Advocate and how their faces changed then you have gotten a neat little glimpse into my world. You're welcome.
I appreciate you bearing with me so I'll end this episode here with a preview of what will be covered in this journey of madness. I'll hit my constant struggle as an alcoholic, the devastating effect of losing my first love in high school has still had on my life, meeting the mother of my children after that and our subsequent divorces-yes plural. My journey as a bad parent, friend, son and brother but that no longer defines me either. This journey week even give you a glimpse of mental hospitals from the inside. Oh my...how exciting!
Until next time...stay sane!
R. M. Sully
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