In Case You Didn't Know

As you all know, Julie had started blogging about her experience dealing with my bipolar as my significant other and her perspective from the outside looking in. I love that she's doing that.

I love that she's doing that because it has helped me in many ways. She asks tons of questions from a place of wanting to understand and help. I feel very comfortable talking to her about what I'm feeling and will answer anything she throws my way.

I'm able to do that because she makes me feel safe and she doesn't judge. I'm at a point of in case you didn't know...I am feeling like this. She also holds me accountable. Instead of being upset and saying nothing, i tell her what has my anxiety peaked, why my frustration may seem unwarranted but isn't to me. Yes it may take some well-placed questions at times from her but i am talking.

I get scared and i can admit that. It's scary to tell someone what goes on in your head sometimes when you have bipolar. It's scary to have someone reassure you that something didn't happen, even though you swear it did. It's scary to let someone in on 100% of your life without worrying that they're going to run screaming or tell me to take a flying leap.

So this is new to me but I'm digging it. It gets less scary and intrusive each day. Yes it feels intrusive to me because bipolar has been mine for so many years that i feel like I'm being peeled like a potato talking about it intimately. I can talk about it in general to everyone else but this is someone I'm sharing my life with. Someone whose opinion means everything to me. Someone that i don't want to leave. Someone that is someone to me. That scares the shit out of me but for once it's not going to control me and my happiness.

So in case you didn't know...thank you Julie. Everything you've done means the world to me. You mean the world to me❤

I'm not bipolar-I have bipolar
R. M. Sully